Have
you ever attended a workshop that really turned you on? I did. It was five
years ago and I still use techniques learned there and quote one special
piece. I want to share it with you now.
The class was on Active Communicating. A book was referenced called The
Four Fold Way by Angeles Arrien. The concept of the book was that the
indigenous people of the globe all have something to teach the rest of us.
And the interesting thing is, many of them, no matter how far removed from
other "tribes" they were, had similar lessons for us. Ms. Arrien
researched and compiled these lessons into what she calls the Four Fold
Way. Here they are.
- Show up and choose to be present.
- Pay attention to what has heart and meaning.
- Tell the truth without blame or judgment.
- Be open to outcome, not attached to outcome.
Take your time reading these. There are many layers of meaning in
there.
When being present, we avoid mental multi-task. Ever attend a
meeting and your bottom was in the chair, but the rest of you (your brain,
your thoughts, your energies) were somewhere else? Maybe you were worrying
about what was happening at the front desk. Thinking about what you have
to do to prepare for a big group’s arrival later that week. Or replaying
a conversation you had earlier in the day. If you are busy doing all that,
how is your ability to listen to what is happening right around you right
now? Are you getting the best from the moment you are in? Are you asking
the right questions to get the best answers to the topic on the table? Are
you even enjoying yourself as much as you could be? Hmm. It has been said
that if you choose to be "present" you get a "present"
of the moment.
Pay attention to what has heart and meaning. Another way we have
all heard this lesson is "Don’t sweat the small stuff". Spend
your energies on what is important. Stephen Covey talks about this when he
has you work through the four quadrants of his time management process.
Invest your time in what is important and you find you need to spend less
time on urgencies. Isn’t this one of the basic concepts of Preventive
Maintenance?
Have the ability to tell the truth without blame or judgment.
Wow, this is a good one. How much finger pointing goes on at your place?
The food was late to the table because of the kitchen. The rooms weren’t
ready because the desk didn’t tell housekeeping they needed them by
2:30pm. Are these issues that need to be fixed? Sure. How do you talk to
each other about them? Moan and groan or calmly put the issue on the table
and come together to find a solution? Two-way, respectful conversation.
Same goal, same team. How you approach each other and how open to
listening to each other is a big determining factor in whether you get to
the solutions. Then there’s the whole conversation about how well we
should be taking care of the Internal Customer.
Be open to outcome rather than attached to an outcome that you
want. Have you ever gotten lost on your way somewhere and come across that
great restaurant everyone was talking about but you never knew where it
was? How cool! Instead of griping about being lost, you used the
experience to your advantage. The same can happen at meetings. You may
arrive with a mental game-plan, but with the different perspectives of
others’ on the topic, you find yourself on a completely new track. There
are usually many right answers/solutions to a situation. Being open to
them allows all sorts of possibilities. New ideas, innovations,
competitive advantages.
I have posted The Four Fold Way in my office as a reminder to follow
these proven teachings and share them whenever I get the chance. I invite
you to do the same.
